


If You Love Something

by allmylovesatonce



Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:26:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26638054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allmylovesatonce/pseuds/allmylovesatonce
Summary: Alex calls Henry to tell him a funny incident from his day. When a miscommunication sends them both reeling, both of them are questioning if the other is wanting to end their relationship. Their friends take things upon themselves to get them to see eye to eye.
Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor
Comments: 23
Kudos: 170





	If You Love Something

**Author's Note:**

> This is inspired by an episode of Schitt's Creek and I thought it would be fun to put Alex and Henry in this situation. This is set somewhere between LA and Wimbledon.

Alex is looking at the card in his hand, still laughing to himself as the call connects. 

“Hello?”

“You know what’s funny?” Alex says, as usual, not giving any type of greeting. 

Henry chuckles on the other end of the line. “No, what’s funny?” 

“It’s funny the way the world works. Like when you’re not looking for people and they throw themselves at you.” 

“How do you mean? I’d figure as the supposedly most eligible bachelor America has to offer, you’d be used to women throwing themselves at you,” Henry replies. 

“Yeah, that’s the thing. This time it was a guy.” 

There’s a bit of silence before Henry says, “What happened?” 

Alex lays down on his bed, one arm curled behind his head. “Some guy gave me his number. Do I give off bi vibes now? I mean...I guess more than usual? It’s just funny to me that now that I’ve been with you, now guys are throwing themselves at me too. Well, this guy was respectful. Just gave me a card with his number on it, but it’s just funny.” 

“How is it funny?” There’s something in Henry’s voice. An edge. 

“Just like, the fact that this is happening now, you know, when I’m half the time flying anywhere in the world to see you.” 

Henry breathes in a deep breath. “Ahh. Okay.” There’s another long beat of silence. “So are you going to call this person?” 

Alex frowns, sitting up. “What?” 

“I mean, they gave you their number. Are you going to use it?” 

Alex shakes his head before remembering that Henry can’t see him. “Of course not. I wasn’t telling you because of that. I was —” 

“Maybe you should,” Henry says in a strange tone. 

“You want me to call this person? This random guy?” 

“I think it could be good for you.” 

Now, Alex is extremely confused. “Why would it be good for me?” 

“Just, you know, you’ve been with women but I’m the only guy you’ve been with. It could be good for you to see what it’s like with another guy,” Henry tells him. 

Alex wants to remind him that he told him about Liam and the stuff they did in high school. He’s not sure what’s gotten into Henry, though. After LA, it was emails of when could they see each other again and how much they wanted to repeat what had happened. Alex still feels that way. This is the first time he’s questioning if Henry feels the same way. 

“I wasn’t planning on going out with him,” Alex says in a small voice. 

“I know, but don’t feel like you can’t.” 

Alex stares up at his ceiling, wondering when things changed for Henry. He thought they were equally as desperate to see each other. Maybe he was wrong. He has half a mind to get on a plane —public reason not included— and go to Kensington to ask Henry what’s going on in his head. He wonders if Henry’s been spending too much time with Philip. 

There are a hundred things he could be doing for the campaign, but right now, all he wants to do is interrogate Henry. 

“You really think I should go on a date with this guy?” Alex presses. He’s giving Henry an out. 

“It’s not like it has to mean anything, but sure. Why not? It could be enlightening for you.” 

He opens his mouth to ask if Henry thinks he needs more experience. After all the times they’ve been together, he thinks he’s gotten pretty good. He just doesn’t get what’s going on. 

“So I should just call this guy and go out with him?” 

“Like I said, why not?” 

Alex huffs out a breath, wanting to shake Henry, wanting to know why he’s pushing Alex at some other guy. “Fine, then I guess I will. We’ll go out this weekend,” he lies. He’s not going to call this guy. No way. He’s just pushing Henry. 

“Good for you,” Henry replies. Clearing his throat, he says, “Well, er, I have an engagement in the morning. I should probably try to sleep. Goodnight, Alex.” 

“Night, Henry.” 

Alex hangs up the call and groans loudly at the ceiling. He doesn’t get what’s going on. A knock at the door sounds through the room. Before Alex can answer, the door is opening and Nora walks in. 

“Everything okay?” she asks. “I was hedging my bets coming in here, but that sounded like a frustrated groan, not a sexual groan.” 

Alex doesn’t say anything in reply. 

Nora sits down on his bed. “I was just heading home, so if you want me to go, I’ll go. But I’m also a great listener…” 

“I called Henry to tell him this funny story about a guy giving me his number,” Alex starts. 

“Why would you tell your boyfriend that?” Nora asks. 

“He’s not my boyfriend!” Nora raises one eyebrow in reply and Alex rolls his eyes. “Anyway. I just thought it was funny because I was never going to use it because I have...whatever I have with Henry.” 

“Okay…” 

“But he told me to go out with the guy. He said it would be good experience since I’ve only been with Henry.” 

Nora’s mouth forms into a line and then twists as she’s thinking. “I mean, that’s not terrible advice. But it’s more advice  _ I’d  _ give you rather than Henry. I don’t see him being super cool with you dating or doing other people.” 

“I don’t really  _ want  _ to do other people,” Alex says in a small voice. 

Nora tries and fails to suppress a grin. “Does he know that? Have you guys talked about what you are to each other?” 

Alex avoids her gaze. She smacks him.

“Maybe you fucking should! You two could not have been more obvious in LA. At least to those of us who know. So maybe you need to tell him that you like him.” 

“I guess. But I figured he knew. I didn’t think he’d be shoving me at other guys.” 

“I bet you anything that he’s already regretting that,” Nora says. 

“Or maybe he’s just pushing me at someone else because he’s done with whatever this is.” 

Nora smacks him again. “Shut up. It’s not that.” 

“Why would he push me at someone else then?” 

“Have you ever heard the phrase, ‘If you love something, let it go’?” 

Alex gives her a look. “Henry doesn’t  _ love  _ me.” 

Nora laughs. “Sure, okay. But even so, maybe he thinks he’s doing something nice for you.” 

He shrugs in reply. “If he lived closer, I’d just go over there and make him tell me what he’s thinking.” 

“So maybe you should do that.” 

“How am I going to get the money to go to England? I can’t take Air Force One.” 

Nora is silent for a moment before she pulls out her phone. “Do you actually want to see him?” 

“I mean, yeah. But —” 

“Shhh!” She jumps off his bed and runs out into the hallway. Alex is confused as he stares after her. After a couple of minutes of Alex sitting there, wondering what Nora is doing, wondering what Henry is up to, she walks back in with a flourish. “You’ve got a flight to London tomorrow at 8:00.” 

“Excuse me? I can’t afford that.” 

“Don’t worry, you’re not paying for it. Also, I checked and you had this weekend free anyway. So it all works out perfectly.”

Alex stares at her in complete confusion. “How on earth is this happening?” 

“You see, I’m a genius. I figure if you’re miserable on this side of the ocean, Henry is probably miserable on  _ that  _ side of the ocean. Right? So I reached out to the person that I knew would be the most annoyed by this situation on Henry’s side of things. And conveniently, they’re rich.” 

“Pez?” 

“Pez,” Nora confirms with a grin. “He’s sending a plane.” 

“This is insane,” Alex says. 

“Just go on and go. Seriously.” 

Alex sits up and looks toward his closet. “I guess. If Pez is going through the trouble anyway.” 

Nora smiles, throwing out her arms. “I love solving problems.” Leaning forward, she kisses Alex on the head and starts to walk from the room. “I’m heading home but I expect all the juicy details when you return, Alejandro.” 

“Fine.” 

Nora turns around in the doorway and shoots him a look. “I’m waiting for a thank you, idiot.” 

Alex smiles and looks over at her. “Thank you, Nora. Really.” 

* * *

Henry is pacing. He’s an idiot. A fucking idiot. He’s not sure why he’s so good at self sabotage. It’s been maybe 15 hours since Alex called him and he’s been beating himself up the whole time. There’s a chance he was just calling to laugh about it with Henry. Why couldn’t Henry go along with that? Why did he tell Alex to go on the date? He  _ finally  _ got Alex to see him as more than a prick and has gotten to actually be with him. Why is he throwing that away? What if Alex likes this other man and decides it’s easier and more sustainable to date that man instead? What drove Henry to potentially throw away his only shot with Alex? It’s all he’s wanted since he fucking met him. 

Bea finds him in a less than pleasant state. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Frankly, I’m panicking.” 

Bea chuckles as she throws herself on Henry’s bed. “Why is that?” 

“I was an idiot.” 

“You’ll have to be more specific.” Henry glares at her. “Okay, what happened, H?” 

“I told Alex to go out with another man.” 

Bea stares at him, a look of plain confusion on her face. “What?” 

“Well, really I pushed him into the arms of another man. He’s probably getting ready for his date right now.” 

“I’m so confused.” 

“He called to tell me that he got some man’s number and I told him to go for it. I said it would be good for him to be with another man than me. And we haven’t talked since.” 

“When was this?” 

“Last night.” 

“What rules did you lay down?” 

Henry freezes in his steps. “What do you mean by rules?” 

Bea shrugs. “You know,  _ rules.  _ Like, is this a one date thing? Is it a casual thing? Does he get to proper date the man? What are the rules?” 

“I didn’t give any rules,” Henry says, a fresh wave of panic rushing over him. “I just told him to go for it.” 

“Well, then Henry, I agree with you. That was idiotic. You are finally with Alex and this is what you do?” 

Henry sits down in his chair and covers his face with his hands. After a long moment, he gently lays his hands down against the arms of the chair, looking over at his sister. “No, I’ve decided this is fine. I mean, logically, this thing with Alex — whatever it is — it’s never going to be something  _ real.  _ You know? I can’t offer Alex a real relationship because Gran would never let me. And eventually he’ll grow tired of that. Or he’ll realize that I’m not worth all the sneaking around and the risk and he’ll leave anyway. So, in a way, it’s better to do this now. I got a taste of what it’s like to be with him and I’ll have that forever, right? And now he can go meet someone who could be with him in public and not keep him trapped in the shadows. It’s best to do this now before either of us get too carried away.” 

Bea stares at him with nothing but disgust. “Henry, you don’t give yourself nearly enough credit, you know that? Alex clearly cares about you. Did he even call to ask you if he could go on this date or did he just call you to tell you about getting the number?” 

Henry shrugs. “I don’t know. I guess he called because he thought it was funny. But…” 

“But you made him go out with the man?” 

He hangs his head and nods. When he thinks back on the end of his and Alex’s relationship, he’ll know that he has no one but him to blame. 

His mind flashes back to LA. It seemed so bloody perfect then. Even the next morning when he was moody over going back to London, over leaving Alex, Alex was still there, trying to cheer him up, kissing him and promising him that it would all be okay. And now, just a couple of weeks removed from that, Henry is fucking it all up. He wants that night back — blissfully drunk and happy. Part of him thinks he should just fly to DC and tell Alex not to go on the date. As he looks at his watch, he knows he wouldn’t make it in time. And how would that really look? What excuse could he come up with to go there? 

“I’m an idiot,” he whispers, mostly to himself, but also to Bea. 

“Yeah, but the thing is, you can do something about it,” Bea tells him. 

“Like what?” 

“Call him!” 

“What, before he even goes on the date?” 

“Yes. Tell him you were being stupid and you don’t want him to go.” 

“That seems unfair. What if he’s excited about it now? What if it really is the right thing to call it off now?” 

“Henry, stop overthinking things and just call him.” Bea tosses his phone over to him. 

He takes a deep breath and presses Alex’s number. It rings a few times before it goes to voicemail. With a sigh, he hangs up and looks at Bea. “He didn’t answer. Probably for the best. I’ve gotten too carried away.” 

Bea stands up from his bed and paces a bit. “If I could get away with murder, I’d off Gran in a heartbeat.” 

Henry breathes out a laugh. “Oh? Why’s that?” 

“Because she’s the one who’s beaten you down to feel like this. Henry, you deserve to be happy. You deserve to have Alex. Or at the very least, someone you’d be happy with. I hate listening to you talk about yourself like you  _ agree  _ with them.” She steps toward him and fixes him with a look. “Keep calling him. He’ll answer eventually — even if it’s just to tell you to piss off. At least then, you’ll know. As for me, I’m going down to the kitchens to tell them not to bring you any alcohol if you request it.” She turns around at the door and looks at him. “You’re already in a bad enough state.” 

Henry sighs and lets her go. He’d rather be alone anyway. 

* * *

Bea is barely out the door when she calls Pez. “You need to come over and tend to Henry. I can’t do it on my own. I’m getting nowhere. He’s so miserable about this situation with Alex.” 

“What do you mean? He’s still miserable. He should be bloody delighted,” Pez says. 

“What do you mean? Why should he be delighted?” 

“Because Alex — hold on, what time is it?” There’s a pause as he checks the time, muttering to himself on the other end of the call. “Well, maybe he can still be miserable, but in a few minutes, he should be bloody delighted.” 

“Do you care to tell me why?” 

“I got a call from Nora, telling me how miserable Alex is and that he feels the need to talk to Henry, but he thinks he’d lie over the phone. Or he wasn’t sure Henry even wanted to talk to him. Anyway, I sent a plane for Alex. He should be there soon.” 

“You sent a plane for Alex? He’s coming here?” 

“Yes.” 

“Bless you, Percy.” 

“I figured they’d just spend their time playing emotional chicken and they’d just end up with both of them miserable. Might as well just get it out in the open now.” 

“Brilliant. You’re a good friend.” 

“I like to think so. Keep me posted on things.” 

“I certainly will.” 

She’s just hanging up the phone when Shaan flags her down. “Your Highness, I need to speak with you for a moment.” She nods to him. “There’s a car outside at the gate with Alex Claremont-Diaz wanting to get inside. Prince Henry has not extended an invitation, but I know he would most likely not be opposed to seeing Mr. Claremont-Diaz. Still, without an invitation —” 

“I invited him,” Bea says, cutting him off. Shaan looks at her skeptically. “As a surprise for my brother. He’s been having a hard go of it this week, so I had Alex come here as a surprise. Please do let him in.” 

Shaan looks clearly suspicious, but nods and walks off toward the door. Bea pumps her fist in the air and goes to meet Alex. 

* * *

Henry’s head is leaning against the back of the chair, his eyes wrenched shut as he sits in his own displeasure. There’s a knock at the door. He figures it’s Bea again so he ignores it. If it’s her, she’ll let herself in. If it’s not, he doesn’t need to talk to anyone else. When there’s a second knock, he remains in his place. The third knock makes him open his eyes and the fourth one finally has him out of his chair. 

“What?” Henry yells, opening the door, his eyes landing on a suitably shocked Alex. “Alex?” he asks. Surely his eyes are just playing tricks on him. “What are you doing here?” 

He almost looks nervous. “Uh, I was in the area.” 

“You were in London?” 

“Is DC not considered in the same area as London?” 

Henry stands there watching him, staring at his perfect face and the hair he loves to run his fingers through. He’s taking in the whole package of the man he feels more for than he needs to. Even with him here, he still feels like Alex is slipping through his fingers, like if he doesn’t stare at him enough, appreciate him enough, he’ll have nothing left of him when Alex is inevitably gone. 

Alex is watching him too. Nervousness is coming off of him in waves. Finally, Henry has the good sense to step aside and let Alex in. 

“I, er, thought you’d be on a date right now.” 

“Well, I’m not. I came here instead.” 

Henry’s heart leaps a bit at that. He wants to get his feelings under control but having Alex here in his room is too much for him. Just minutes ago, he’d thought this was basically over. “Why?”

Alex walks further in the room before turning around. “I didn’t want to go out with the guy. I never did. I mean, for one, I’m not out, so I couldn’t really go on an actual date with a guy. But also, I didn’t want to go out with  _ him.  _ I only called you and told you about it because I thought it was funny. I guess I figured you already knew how much I didn’t want to go out with him.” 

Henry crosses his arms, unsure of what to do or say. He nods lamely. “Oh.” 

“But, you know, if you pushing me at this guy was a way to end...this...then,” Alex trails off, not looking at Henry anymore. “Well, I guess I just wanted to know in person.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Are you done with me? Is that what you were doing by encouraging me to go out with someone else?” 

Henry steps forward, shaking his head madly. “No, Alex, I wasn’t.” 

“Are you sure? Because, I don’t want to see anyone else. Even if it would be a lot easier to secretly date someone in my own city or whatever…” 

“Are you the one who wants to stop things between us?” Henry asks, suddenly defensive. 

“No! I wouldn’t have come here if I wanted things to be over between us.” Alex looks up at the ceiling, an annoyed look on his face. Henry wonders if he’s blowing it all up again. “I thought you were done with things. But I didn’t know for sure. I just...I don’t want it to be over.” 

Henry hates the uncertain look on Alex’s face. He hates even more that it was him who put it there. Without thinking much past it, he steps forward, cups Alex’s face in his hands and kisses him hard. There’s a surprised huff of a breath against his cheek as Alex wraps his arms around Henry. 

Sooner than he wants to, Henry pulls back and looks at Alex. “That’s what I want,” he says. 

There’s a grin that spreads across Alex’s face. “Me too.” 

Alex kisses him again and Henry gets a bit lost in it. He’s walking them backward and before he can really process it, Henry is being pushed down onto his bed. His eyes open and he sees Alex above him an almost relieved expression on his face. Henry is sure his face matches. Alex kisses him impatiently, not focused anywhere in particular. 

“You have been all I could fucking think about for weeks,” Alex tells him in between kisses along his neck. He takes a moment to pull Henry’s shirt up and over his head. “Ever since LA, it’s been nothing but you in my head. It makes working quite difficult.” Henry breathes out a laugh, his fingers running through Alex’s hair as the man presses kisses to his chest. “I guess I got kind of nervous that it wasn’t the same way for you.” 

Henry’s mind snaps back through the hazy delirium of Alex. He looks down at him, notices how he’s pointedly not meeting Henry’s eyes. That won’t do. Henry surges up and rolls them over, hovering over Alex. His surprised, turned on look is nearly enough to distract Henry. “It’s absolutely been the same way for me. I was just…” He fumbles for an explanation of what he was actually doing. “I was just trying to be noble.” 

Alex grins and shakes his head. “How very princely of you,” he retorts. With a hand at Henry’s neck, Alex yanks his head back down and kisses him deeply. Henry melts against him and sighs against Alex. “Don’t feel the need to do that again,” Alex pants when he breaks away. 

“Noted. No nobility here.” 

Alex laughs. “Good. Show me how un-noble you are, hmm?” He leans forward and takes Henry’s earlobe between his teeth. “I’ve missed you.” 

Henry nearly groans. He kisses Alex messily, his hands flying over his body, his hips rolling against Alex’s. Their clothes are torn off in a messy series of moves, delayed by their need to be kissing and touching each other. Alex flips them over once they’re both naked and has a smug look about him. 

His hand moves tantalizingly slow along Henry’s chest. Alex puts his mouth by Henry’s ear and he can feel his breath on his skin. “Why would I want to go out with anyone else when I could be doing this with you?” he asks, kissing Henry languidly, deeply. He swallows Henry’s moans as his fingers start prepping him. Henry clutches to him, a bit mindblown that this is happening when earlier he’d convinced himself that it never would again. 

Even if things have to one day end with Alex, Henry is going to enjoy every single moment he gets with him. 

He pats at Alex’s arm to get his attention. “I’m ready,” he breathes. 

Alex nods and slides on a condom, slicking himself up. The two of them share a long look before Henry nods and Alex pushes in. Henry moans loudly, holding onto Alex. It’s just as good as it was last time, maybe even better. He moves with Alex and kisses him and touches every part of him. Alex palms his hips like they’ll bruise so Henry drags his nails down his back. Alex leaves a bite on his chest. Henry knows he’ll run his fingers over it afterward, tomorrow perhaps, happy to think of this moment. They give each other the assurance that it’s not the end of them and Alex coaxes Henry over the edge, following him quickly. 

They’re laying there in a post-coital haze, arms lazily wrapped around each other. “I know it’s not anything fancy,” Henry says, dragging his fingers up and down Alex’s arm. “But I could have some food or something sent up for us. You know, since you were supposed to be on a date.” 

Henry expects Alex to make some joke, but he doesn’t. He leans up on his elbow and looks down at Henry with a serious look on his face. “I was never going on that date. You know that, right?” He brushes Henry’s hair off his forehead. “I didn’t even want to. I wasn’t calling for permission or whatever. I just thought that it’s funny how things work like that. I wasn’t —” 

He leans up and kisses Alex, a gentle hand weaving through his hair. “I know,” he says softly. Laying back down, he stares up at the ceiling. “I thought if it worked out with this other person, maybe it would be easier.” He won’t meet Alex’s eyes. 

He’s almost surprised when Alex climbs on top of him, grabbing his face and holding his gaze. “I don’t want easy, Henry.” Henry watches him, praying he doesn’t see some sort of tell. “I want this,” he promises. Alex leans down and kisses him softly. 

Henry wraps his arms around him and kisses him back. It’s soft and easy, no rushing to move it into something more. Just a kiss, just reassurance. “Me too,” Henry finally whispers. Alex smiles before kissing him again. 

Logically, he knows this can’t last forever. Gran would never allow it. But Henry doubles down on his promise to enjoy it all as it happens. More than once he’s thought things would never happen or wouldn’t continue to happen with Alex. He’s more than happy to be proven wrong. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I wrote this as a way to delay finishing my amnesia fic! Maybe another chapter of that will be posted or maybe another one shot will be. Who's to say?


End file.
